Every time Valentine’s Day creeps up on us, I see the same old complaints on social media. So many people loathe love day. A lot of people talk about how it’s pressure to spend money or that it’s a slam to the single people. I think both are a bit off. I mean, yes, capitalism has taken hold of pretty much every holiday, but there’s so much more to February 14th than flowers and candy.

It doesn’t have to be all about romance.

Even when I was single, I found ways to celebrate it. Love is love and doesn’t always have to be geared towards a partner. Why not love yourself? Why not love your pets or family? There’s so many options when it comes to love. For me, it’s kind of a gushy version of Thanksgiving. I eat things I probably shouldn’t, and I celebrate how grateful I am for the ones I love.

I know it’s supposed to be about romantic love, but who the hell cares? If you don’t like the expected version of Valentine’s Day, make it your own. There’s so much you could do if you don’t want it to be about a significant other. Spread the love around.

  • If you have pets, get them their favorite treats, or go to a dog park.
  • Visit family and take baked goods or sweets.
  • Take your mom or grandma some flowers or a card.
  • Have a dinner with friends.

Let go of the past or negative associations.

I totally understand that some people have bad memories associated with this holiday because of past relationships. I get it! I had a long term boyfriend once buy me a discounted movie for $7, price tag right on the front, and a candy bar. He ate the candy bar, by the way. It wasn’t the money he spent that bothered me, it’s that he didn’t care. I don’t let my past relationships define me, so why would I let them ruin an entire day. Who has time for that type of negativity?

Make it your own.

Even as a married woman, my husband and I don’t go all out. We aren’t big on gift exchanges anyway. We’d rather make a big meal together and give small thoughtful things. We also love to involve our kids. Once the evening is coming to an end, we may add in some romance, but we make it a family occasion for the majority of the day.

Before we had kids, we would visit family and show our appreciation in small ways like bringing someone coffee or lunch. We’ve never broken the bank just to show each other or others we love them. We always made the day our own. We don’t get reservations for a fancy dinner. We just find simple ways to show our appreciation for each other and our families.

Be Positive.

I know a lot of people who talk about Valentine’s Day like it’s doomsday. I just don’t understand why you have to put so much effort and negativity into hating something. Even if you don’t want to celebrate, why make your own day bad? Why put down others for enjoying the day? Let it go. Learn to love yourself and let others go about their day.

Fun Ideas for Everyone

  • Have a cozy fire. Whether you live in a cold or warm area, make a fire and cozy up. Make s’mores with the family or cuddle up with a loved one. Fire places or fire pits could both come in handy.
  • Make your own candy. Whether it’s with friends, family, or as a couple. Spend some time making candy and taste testing together.
  • Take a class. Check into local places for cake decorating, dancing lessons, and paint nights. Find a class to take, and learn something new.
  • Wine/Bar crawl. I’m sure there will be anti-Valentine’s Day and pro-Valentine’s Day events going on with wine and bar crawls. Go out with friends, as a couple, or go meet new people. Anti-love or not, enjoy it rather than bashing it.
  • Go to a comedy or burlesque show. Laugh it up or enjoy some sexy, skillful dancing.
  • Hit up an adult store. Embrace your sexual side and go to the sex shop. My husband and I aren’t shy about taking a trip to the adult store. We get a babysitter for two hours, and make it a date. There’s everything from lingerie to lotions.
  • Enjoy a spa day. Whether with a partner, or alone, enjoy a day of pampering. You don’t have to spend a lot of money if you choose to have a relaxing day at home with a bubble bath and bubbly.

Feel free to share your ideas for Valentine’s Day, and try to be more positive this year.

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I'm a wife and stay at home mom. I'm not a domestic goddess but more like a demi-goddess, because I don't have super strength or multiple arms. I have two hands and just try to drink my coffee and conquers the momdays.